Are matchmakers for Jews necessary?

The role of cultural dynamics and norms within families of persons with mental illness has been an underexplored subject, although the familial context has been recognized as influential. This subject was studied with 24 ultra-Orthodox Jewish mothers of persons with mental illness who live in a relatively closed religious community. While participating in the Keshet educational program designed for family caregivers in mental health, they wrote Meaningful Interactional Life Episodes that involved a dialogue exchange in their lives. Qualitative analysis of 50 episodes illuminates the significant role that religious and cultural norms have in the perceptions of what are considered stressors and the dynamics in these families surrounding these stressors. The necessity and value of incorporating cultural competence into family educational programs and interventions is emphasized, as this may contribute to the potential use and success of mental health service models within a population that essentially underutilizes these services. Keywords: Keshet course; Meaningful Interactional Life Episode; events analysis; female caregivers; matchmaking; mental illness; religion; religious community; religious traditions; ultra-Orthodox Jews; wounded storyteller.

New York Times Features Lubavitch Matchmaker & Other Orthodox Jews in the News

In one hand she holds a filing card with a photograph stapled to it. In the other is her phone. She peers at the card and tells the rabbi on the end of the line: “Her parents are separated, not divorced. Sirota flips the card over and reads out a couple of names and phone numbers: references provided by the young woman for community elders who will attest to her character.

The Jewish matchmaker. Arranged marriage is usual for ultra-orthodox Jews and parents are keen to check out prospective partners and their.

Their connection felt genuine and she was eager to cut out the middleman. Her future husband was less certain and suggested they wait. For instance, a shadchen acting as an intermediary at the beginning of a relationship served Lily in her early 20s, but was less effective as she matured. Lily attributes this disconnect to the reality that shidduch dating was originally intended for people in their late teens and early 20s. He says that, thanks to his work, 58 couples have gotten engaged.

He generally sets up young, secular Jews, because he feels that non-Orthodox Jews have limited dating resources. He also writes a monthly advice column in The CJN. Finding your soulmate is reuniting those two lost halves, whose destinies have been entwined from the start. For Anna Sherman, a marriage and family therapist who for 17 years has made matches in her spare time, the motivation to set people up stems from a distinct sense of empathy for the emotional distress shidduch dating can cause.

Three couples she introduced have gotten married. She often matches people who are baal teshuvah, or have become more observant, as she knows from experience that they are often stigmatized in the religious dating world. As a therapist, Sherman feels as though she has more insight into what matters to people and how they operate than many others do.

In Orthodox Dating Scene, Matchmakers Go Digital

Your Name required. Your Email required. Your Message. I deal with older singles who are already in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond. The future is bright for these students and for all of Israel thanks to new institutions like this one established with great courage by Rabbi Bombach. But the regional championship would take place March 16 to 18, with matches scheduled on Shabbat, which was out of the question for the Orthodox team.

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Times have changed, and that is a good thing—especially the fading-away of cruel taboos that once stigmatized women who engaged in premarital sex or bore children out of wedlock. Thing is, times change for a reason. The values question assumes that sexual mores loosen naturally from conservative to liberal. In reality, these values have ebbed and flowed throughout history, often in conjunction with prevailing sex ratios. But the problem is a demographic one. Multiple studies show that college-educated Americans are increasingly reluctant to marry those lacking a college degree.

This bias is having a devastating impact on the dating market for college-educated women. According to population estimates from the U. Among college grads age 30 to 39, there are 7. They change behavior too. According to sociologists, economists and psychologists who have studied sex ratios throughout history, the culture is less likely to emphasize courtship and monogamy when women are in oversupply.

Dating and Disordered Eating in the Orthodox Jewish Community

Before the coronavirus pandemic hit, Cedric DuBose of Houston was completing a nine-week online course called “Love Alchemy. At 48, DuBose, who works in research and development for a pharmaceutical company, had grown weary of looking for love on his own. He considered online dating a bust. And I’m not the hookup type. The more constructive approach has become a way forward for many matchmakers, first in the age of internet dating and now in the age of covid Lisa Clampitt is a founder and president in Manhattan of the Matchmaking Institute, which holds conferences and provides training for industry professionals.

A new matchmaking service pairs Orthodox Jewish gay men and lesbians. But Orthodox Jewish rabbis say the site should get gays and lesbians to try to.

Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match. While going to a matchmaker in might seem old-fashioned, for some Orthodox Jews, this is still a common practice. But what about Orthodox Jews who come from more unconventional backgrounds, like trying to remarry or marry later in life? The year-old who lives in Kensington, Brooklyn told the New York Times about why she chose to work with this demographic — as opposed to the usual suspects:.

I deal with divorced people. I deal with older singles who are already in their 30s, 40s, 50s and beyond. Lerner-Miller herself considers herself something of an outsider, so she feels especially attached to the people she works with. Lerner-Miller even dabbled in Catholicism in her 20s. You have freedom to say no. There has to be something — a tugging of a heart. It takes you out of yourself, it gives you the reason to feel and deal with the needs of another person.

Sometimes, you just have to go with your heart. Image: Flickr.

Ultra-orthodox matchmaking: Everything it’s best not to know

Deseret News – Sunday, September 16, Jews beefing up holiday security Rabbi Benny Zippel of Chabad Lubavitch said his congregation will have “regular security but we don’t want to turn synagogue into a military barrack. We normally have some type of security. The fact that we experienced what we did this past Tuesday, we need to work to sensitize ourselves to what the people in the Middle East go through almost on a daily basis. Literally from one day to the next, we might not be here tomorrow, so I think we vow to make the best of life while we’re around.

The new quarters — Lubavitcher Rabbi Benny Zippel before operated out of his home — mean the organization is in the city to stay, at least for the foreseeable future.

The Rise and Fall of Matchmakers. How Jewish marriage brokers lost their standing, outside the Orthodox world. by. Jenna Weissman Joselit. February 13,

I know this too. And I have no doubt that it is normal in practice in many even in some nominally Haredi reviews, I’m sure , but the fact that that’s public opinion surprises me. Halachically speaking, opinions vary approximately from “shaking hands is jewish” to “shaking reviews is not older”, and from “hugging is a biblical prohibition of kareis” to “hugging is a rabbinic prohibition the transgression of which is biblically prohibited “.

I don’t meet kissing on a third date is halachically supported anywhere authoritative , and so even if it is socially supported, I would at least expect people to have sensitivity to the jewish aspect. I don’t think you can accurately make any sort of site about a specific Modern Orthodox apps. I doubt OP surveyed every single person, and the rabbi too — and nothing in her apps that I saw really indicated that this is a apps-wide site.

Just that her maybe-boyfriend is not shomer apps, yet not comfortable kissing yet. No practice of being not shomer negiah is rabbinically sanctioned. I don’t think anyone said that or even how claims it to be true. Some sites don’t care, so they do what they want. Of course. But by the same token, “some people” are being taken seriously by OP I don’t know why, but there’s obviously some reason for that.

Either it’s representative of the community or it’s a sub-community that OP has spoken to. Either way I find it strange I’m not passing judgement on Modern Orthodoxy or that particular community, just making a general statement, which I still think is valid.

The New Republic

The world of dating can be rough. There are bars and parties, organized singles groups, websites and apps, swiping right and swiping left. Melamed believes matchmaking is in her blood. Originally from Boro Park in Brooklyn, Melamed says her mother has done matchmaking for decades. After high school, Chani herself, caught the bug and dabbled in matchmaking.

Sites for Jewish Dating, Matchmaking and Connection – This shidduch/dating service for Orthodox singles uses a well-tested personality.

By Melissa Klein. A new service to help Orthodox Jews make love connections posted unauthorized profiles of hundreds of singles, exposing their private information to would-be suitors. Platt is among those who took to Facebook to complain about the security breach, which was even reported to a religious court. Orthodox singles seeking a partner often give their profiles — known as a shidduch resume — to friends or respected matchmakers who might have a prospect for them.

The profiles are expected to be kept discreet and not shared with a wide audience. Sternbuch blamed the data breach on matchmakers inadvertently uploading dating profiles from their personal databases and said they had now been deleted. Sternbuch, who also uses the name Naftali Zuckerberg, refused to tell The Post anything about his background or even his age.

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Mormons and Jews: What 2 Religions Say About the Modern Dating Crisis

To improve your visit to our site, take a minute and upgrade your browser. These women, professional shadchanim , or matchmakers, ask the men and women about their family connections and education, who they know, where they pray. The shadchanim dismiss their unmarried charges after the interviews, then huddle together in a dark room lined with ancient religious texts. Speaking in a mixture of English, Yiddish, and Hebrew, they rifle through their notes, searching for matches.

Their service differs from typical shidduch (matchmaking) businesses. community — and the hardships of Modern Orthodox Jewish dating.

Inspired by millennia of tradition and guided by the eternal teachings of the Torah , Jewish communities have developed a unique pattern of courtship and dating. The process is goal-oriented, beautiful and respectful. Read more. I am 69, but look like I am in my late 30s due to Organic living. I’m new here Anyone suggest jewish matchmakers? What is the minimum age for a girl??

Can we make it simple, Jewish gentleman seeks eligible nice Jewish girl. Such Wisdom Spoken from Learned Rabbi’s! Todah Rabah! Really good text I loved that part of the Sage’s counselling. To Anonymous, Age varies depending on community customs, it is common to start the process anywhere from eighteen and up. Can you recommend a good jewish matchmaker? Please Reply.

The Unorthodox Matchmaker

Emily Harris. Matchmakers are the traditional way to find a mate in the ultra-Orthodox Jewish community to which Mizrachi belongs. But she is not entirely traditional. Mizrachi is part of a growing number of ultra-Orthodox Jews in Israel who are seeking job skills, getting higher education or joining the military. And those changes are shaking up the community’s established customs for finding a spouse.

On a practical level, to Mizrachi, being “modern ultra-Orthodox” means she wears long sleeves and long skirts, but also drives — something unmarried women in her community normally do not do.

Make Me A Match is the portrait of three Jewish-Orthodox singles — their matchmakers and their effort to stay loyal to a possibly outdated tradition.

By Liana Satenstein. Photographed by Gillian Laub. There are layers, both literal and spiritual, to getting dressed as a Hasidic person or an ultra-Orthodox Jew. There is, of course, a skirt that goes below the knee. Women are not allowed to wear pants. These men will dictate details like wig style or skirt length. In one case, there is Abby Stein, a transgender woman who meets me at a coffee shop near Columbia University, where she is currently studying public policy and gender studies.

Now a trans activist, she was once a rabbi who hailed from a high-ranking Hasidic dynasty, a mishmash of two of the most extreme sects, Bobov and Satmar. She is a direct descendant of the founder of Hasidic Judaism, the Baal Shem Tov, and compares her early life to something like being born into European royalty. Stein eventually left the sect with the help of Footsteps, a nonprofit New York—based organization that provides support to the ultra-Orthodox looking to leave the community.

In , Stein officially came out to her parents. Another woman, who is still a part of a religious community but secretly lives a secular life, will leave her house with pants under her skirt. When a woman comes out or is outed as not religious, she is at risk of being ostracized and having her children taken away from her. But when she leaves the confines of the community and is in jeans—sans wig—Leah is liberated.

Shidduch Profile Basics- Orthodox Jewish Dating Tool for Matchmaking